I want to grow my own food but I can't find bacon seeds.

This is my step ladder; I never knew my real ladder.

I checked into the hokey pokey clinic and got myself turned around.

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Made with love really means, "I licked the spoon and kept using it."

According to the BMI chart at the doctor's office, I'm 8" too short.

Anything seems possible if you don't know what you are talking about.

Talk is cheap because the supply always exceeds demand.

There is no "I" in team, but there are three in "narcissistic."

Inventor of the wind chill factor died at 82, but he felt like he was 64.

I'm on the lookout for #1, my dog isn't house-trained yet.

I married my wife for her looks, but not the ones I'm getting lately.

Do race horses slow down when they see police horses?

Contributed by Jane Hart

Quotable Quotes

“You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.”

C.S. Lewis

Contributed by Jane Hart